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Does it sometimes feel as though a Band-Aid is being ripped from your heart?

What do you need to become comfortable in your skin again?

What do you say to your kids? To your family? To the “other” family?   Friends? 

Having struggled with the thought of divorce many years ago, and having successfully transitioned through to the other side, Ellen is passionate about helping individuals and families navigate this difficult time.

Whether you are contemplating separation and divorce, in the throes of the process, or years beyond it,

Ellen has the expertise needed to coach and help you maneuver these sometimes-turbulent waters.

As a Divorce Coach, Ms. Schuster-Nastir helps parents excel at parenting during this transition, while creating a new family unit and learning to take time to focus on themselves and their needs. 

How would it feel to have an ally to help you figure out how to make the switch from thinking as a “WE” to an “I” and getting back to who you are and who you want to become?
Imagine having someone to:

  • Partner with you as you navigate through this uncharted territory?
  • Hold the space for you with no other hidden agenda other than what is important for you  and your children?
  • Be able to hold you as naturally creative, resourceful and whole?
  • Remind you of who you really are and what’s important in the long run, when you can’t remember yourself?
  • Hold the flashlight as you make your way through the sometimes dark spots?
  • Remind you of your talents, abilities, and purpose?
  • Explore different perspectives and points of view on situations as they arise?
  • Support you in designing how you want your future to be....taking an active role!
Ask yourself:

What is the “new” normal you want in your daily life?

What new dreams can you create for this new space in your life?

What kind of role model do you want to be for your children?  What legacy will you leave?

Separation and divorce were words you always heard, but never thought they’d be  part of your life. 

It was something that might happen to other people.   And now, it’s you. 

The range of feelings may have you on a continuous roller coaster of emotions—sometimes, with things feeling as though they are spinning out of control!

So...how many plates do you have spinning in the air--- trying not to drop one and have it shatter in a million pieces? 

Do you try to balance work, while at the same time keep your sanity in check, so you don’t “lose” it?

You don’t have to do this alone. 
"Ellen has been my life coach for approximately 7 to 8 months.  I would not know what to do without her! She has taught me how to open my eyes and see the beauty within myself and around me and how to deal with life as it comes.  I recently went thru a divorce 1 year ago this month and that’s how I found Ellen. I am also learning to take credit for my accomplishments and know that I have worked hard for them. I’ve learned from Ellen many helpful life teaching experiences, such as how to deal with that little voice in my head or the "Gremlin" as we like to call him/her.  I love knowing that I have the power to tell that little thing to HUSH and that I am the one in control to decide who and what I can do! 

I am very thankful that I found Ellen! She is a very loving, kind, funny, smart and tough when she needs to be--a special and a gifted soul. I feel like I have become a better, stronger and wiser person thru coaching. Thank you, Ellen, I love you girl!!!!"
Sandy W., mother of 3, Tennessee
Coaching with Ellen through separation and divorce helps you to:  

  • Have an experienced listener to hear what you are not saying and explore with you.
  • have time set aside each week where the focus is 100% on YOU, for whatever your needs are to discuss.
  • brainstorm ideas with someone who has NO other agenda, but YOURS and yours alone.
  • have someone to hold onto your “Big Picture” when you forget -- and it becomes fuzzy.
  • gain clarity and vision for the issues you are confronting.
  • learn how to deal with self-sabotaging conversations you have in your head, that keep you small.

How do I meet my children’s needs AND my own so we all can thrive?

What would it be like to go through the day without knots in your stomach?

Even though your marriage is ending, your parental responsibilities never do. 

You are no longer husband and wife, yet, you will continue to co-parent together for the rest of your lives.

What if you were able to build a NEW relationship with your ex-partner in the here and now—CHOOSING to leave past hurts and injustices right there--in the past.  The only environment to live in is for the healthy benefit of your children… and needless to say, YOU! 

What if you were able to redesign your relationship so your children will thrive, feel safe, and free to love both parents.

What if you were able to co-create with your child’s other parent a space where you both actively participate in all aspects of their lives.

Trust that this IS possible.  Ellen knows it can happen. 
She’s lived it and seen it happen with others.

She's also witnessed when it doesn't happen and the devastation it brings.  There never can be winners when someone loses.

What can you do?
Learn tools to have divorce become the creation of formulating a new existence –-and not be the remnants of a hurtful past that keeps repeating itself.

     How do you start thinking and living as an “I” and not a “we” ?

Parenting at this time can feel extremely difficult as you experience a multitude of feelings---all pulling you in different directions.  You want the best for your children, but sometimes the “overwhelm” is so great, just getting breakfast organized seems like a huge hurdle.

Life is different now.  So many things to think about, new skills to learn (and  not necessarily job skills), calls to make, appointments to arrange, decisions to resolve… all while trying to create a new “normal” for your family?
NOW, are you ready to:

  • Take back control over who you know you are and what you want and need?
  • Take ownership for how you want to “be” during the divorce process?
  • Commit yourself to action and be held accountable for taking steps to move forward?
  • See possibilities in the future as opposed to dreading it?
  • Be open to new insights and exploring new perspectives?
  • Step into your values and prioritize goals based on what’s really important to you?
  • Move focused forward creating the life you deserve?
How will self-control at this time benefit you and your children now… AND also, in the long-run?

Are you coping with the many changes occurring in positive ways or self-destructing ones?

Isn’t it time to take a stand for YOU and make a choice

—a decision—

to move forward NOW

and start exploring what potential you have in creating
your life as you want it to be? 
A Child’s Words…. (may be from a movie, but the writers knew what they were talking about!)
“The reason I went to a lawyer to divorce my parents is because I can’t take living with either one of them anymore.  And please---- don’t switch custody around or anything, cuz that won’t help. 

My mom and dad are just too mixed up for anybody to be around.  I’m just a kid and I don’t know what I’m doing sometimes, but I think you should know better when you are all grown up. 

I think you should know how to act, how to treat people. 

I think if you once loved someone enough to marry them, you should at least be nice to them even if you don’t love them anymore.”

An excerpt from Drew Barrymore’s speech to the court during divorce proceedings in the movie “Irreconcilable Differences.”  
1984
And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom.          
Anais Nin, 1903-1977, French-born Author and Diarist

See:  Testimonials
"Ellen's discussions with me and her workbook have been priceless resources in good times and bad.  I trust Ellen completely.  She provides a safe space to be in which is so important when going through separation and divorce. I value her guidance as she helped me to focus and be clear when I needed to make important decisions.  Her intuititive sense, mixed with her knowledge and expertise in the area of divorce and separation is remarkable.  I'm glad she's with me on my journey." 
Susan S., mom of 2,  Maryland
"I wanted to take a moment and thank you for walking with me though the door to the next chapter of my life. I value the time we had together and gain abundance from it! It was the foundation for me making my life happen instead of letting it happen to me. Thank YOU!"  
Lisa J., Nebraska